fuuu~

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fuuu~ bosan di rumah. humph. just hate this kind of feeling around my period. when i can be so melancholic or weak or something else.

i maybe live in my past. for these recent months. or maybe forever and i just never realized it. haha. dunno. how the past seems so much better than now. that it's so much easier than what is waiting for me now. that i'm just egoist enough to live in that sweet memories without noticing the reality. how pity. yes. and i don't know what to do.

how fast does life change? very fast if i can presume. when we're too busy to have quality time with another person. even the precious one. even the closest ones. how silly and unpredictable hurting to be rejected in any way. just so damn hurt to feel alone. =( once again..maybe it's just because of my period. but anyway i have to spill it out.

i have just realized. it's damn hard to move out from the memories. sweet things that all of us want to keep forever. and some, like myself, want to live it once again. and it's now maybe only dream. or hope. or something but not reality. without any effort to move out from it. phew. how frustrating.

don't feel good at all at the moment. *sigh*

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