Pixie's Singing

If anyone asks me what I believe in at the moment. I’d say I believe in life. I believe in the nature and force of creation. From the birth to the last days. I believe in all seasons. There are times to grown and there are times to die. Beginning and the end. And everything that happens in between, so called good and bad. Every experiences we have, every lessons we learn, every people we meet. Those little moments that ain’t so little for us. Laughters and sadness. Tears of joy and sorrow. One whole package I call life. I don’t think there’s an absolute right or wrong in how we do it. I believe it’s a whole lot process that we need to go through as individual and as society. But mostly it’s a journey your heart and mind gotta make together. It’s hard to not being taken away by the full force tide that’s happening. It’s a challenge to stay true to your heart and mind, and believe in yourself. It’s the battle we’ll do everyday as long as we live. And like pinterest says, it’s the battle ...

I watched  A Star is Born without that much expectation. The hype was too much I though. And I left the movie amazed. I love the stories, the characters, the songs..it’s a great movie. One of the things I got from it is when Jackson told Ally to be true to herself. “If you are not being true to yourself out there, you’re fucked” that’s not the exact words but that’s what I remember. I believe that it’s true. One of the wisest things I got from a movie. And these days, it seems those words became truer and truer. I somehow feel the world is spinning so fast and without clear direction. The current issue is still boiling. It’s not safe yet, the economic condition worsen, people started to ignore warnings. A lot of people do what they can to survive. More businesses appeared, more things came to surface. Part of it is good. Maybe finally we have the time to get to know ourself and what we can do. I sometimes got anxious. So many talents out there, so many things to choose out there, s...

Well, I actually read the theme yesterday, didn’t feel so joyful yesterday, ended up watching netflix and fell asleep 😬😬 Today is surely a so much brighter day. A lot of things going on and I feel so much alive. Let’s start making things that bring me joy today 😉 1. Really nice influencers I have a small brand in Bali and I’m trying to promote it more through ads and influencers. I started contacted some of them yesterday and they replied so fast and in a really friendly ways. Sooo happy to find such friendly and humble people online.  2. New consignment store For the brand, I always try to get new stores to distribute the goods. I had meeting with one new store today and the pic is really nice and enthusiastic. Felt good about it. 3. Friends Met my 2 friends today and they gave me so much joy. Being in the same tune. Made me feel less lonely and less crazy at the same time 😆😆 4. Hot water For the first time in few weeks, my water heater is running well when I took a bath! It’...

What changes? Well,  a lot. I used to feel that I know my life path so certainly. I felt safe because I was so sure of where I’m going. Now? I’m not too sure. Sometimes I feel lost, I don’t know what I want, not sure where to go. Well, I’m scared. Because now, the consequences of every choices I make, becomes so real in front of my eyes. I’m scared of what it might bring me. Will I succeed? Will I not? I surely wish I can be as firm as I was before, it will make few things easier I guess. But, the “I’m scared” part of me teaches me new things. How to take a breath and look wider. See how much effect I will cause if I do certain things. In the end I still choose, hopefully wiser and more logical than just a sudden urge to do something. It surely gives me a wider perspective. I used to be short tempered. I couldn’t take when people don’t do something as I expected, it happens to my team mates, friends..basically related to study and work. But then I became a manager, I handled more p...

Who are you? The hardest 3 words question for me...honestly. Sometimes I do get me, sometimes I don’t. Sometimes I feel like I’m walking in a certain path, and sometimes I feel lost. Sometimes I do understand life, sometimes I don’t. In the end I think I’m just one of the spirits living in a body on Earth. Indonesian word is “daya” and there’s the english word for it, but somehow I don’t feel it defines the word just right. Daya for me is like a combination of energy and spirit. The ever flowing current. It always moves. It always transforms. I’m just this little daya. Taking life and hopefully giving away life, hope and something good to the world. Feel all kind of emotions as I’m flowing further in life. The anger, happiness, jealousy, grace, sadness, amused, and many other emotions that shape me and flow with me through this life. There are days when I can be a flaming fire and there are other days I’m the cold winter blizzard. There are days when I’m Te Fiti and other days I’m Teka...

I am grateful for : 1. My health After discovering that I have autoimmune, it wasn’t a fun journey. I felt that my body was ‘failing’ me. That somehow it just decided to shut down without warning. It has been quite a journey, to heal and to make peace with my own body. And I’m glad that we’re in a pretty great relationship now. 2. My parents For what its worth, they’re the best parents I could ever have. They gave me roots and wings at the same time. It has been a journey to love them both, with whatever ways they do to love me. But I always think that they’re the best parents for me. 3. Relationship with my siblings We weren’t this close before and I’m so glad that we are here now. We share, tease, complain, whatever else...but we talk to each other. And I’m happy for it 4. My best friend Of course. Without her, I wouldn’t be this far too. Unconditional love is just one of many things I get from you. She understands me like no one can. And she saved me a lot of times from my own madne...